Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Marriage
Billy and I got married on May 16, 2009. We celebrated one year together this past May and I feel like we did nothing but argue the first year. I think we both were learning how to be a team and we both wanted things done a certain way and sometimes we collided. I reread a book entitled Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge. It is mainly for the single woman who wants to be married but in the meantime needs to be captivating for other guys to see. I am not talking that she has to give everything away. I am saying that she has to put a little effort out there and let the guy know that she wants a hero. Before I go any further, you must realize that the only validation we need comes from God alone. If we are married then we want our spouse to validate us as well.
That was something that I had to learn to do. Before we were married, Billy was laid off from his job. He got another job a couple months after we were married. He had never worked with children who were sexually abused and at first he wasn't too sure then I started telling him that I believed that he could do it and his countenance began to change all because I told him that I believed in him. He began to feel that he was a man and could do it. On the flip side, he still tells me that I look pretty when I get done up to go out with him. I like being told that so the more we go out with people the more likely I am to take the time and make myself look good. But my sole validation comes from my Heavenly Father who is romancing me and wanting me as his bride.
Billy sometimes gets me flowers and God sends his flowers to me in a variety of ways. There are signs all around that God has done this for me and me alone. How lucky I am to have a Heavenly Father who is willing to go to so much trouble just for me.
When Billy is upset or concerned about something, I always ask him if he wants to talk about it. Sometimes he does and sometimes he says that nothing is wrong. I let it go because when he is ready he will tell me. He does the same to me, he will ask me what's wrong if I have a concerned look on my face. That is the simplest most loving phrase that Billy could ever ask me. I have shown that I need him to be my hero and he comes ready to protect. By the same token, Billy has left me know that he needs me to be his help mate (ezer kenegdo). I said yes to God and sacrificed my job to take on a job of taking care of the things at home. It has not been easy but I enjoy being at home and having the dogs love on me. Aside from the unconditional love of my Heavenly Father, I have unconditional love from the dogs. I can spank them for wrong doing and five seconds later, they are on my lap and licking my face and telling me that they love me no matter what and will be faithful to me to the end.
See, this is why I like being at home. I have my time with God and I also have time to spend with Billy and his parents and the dogs. I have learned more about myself in two years then when I was living on my own and worrying about being married. I love my life and what God has given me.
Dec. 2 marks the two week anniversary that Uncle Bill has left this life and went home to be with the Lord. He and my Grandpa were identical twins. They served in WW2. Grandpa fixed the planes and Uncle Bill flew them. Uncle Bill was also a POW. Aunt Gwyn passed away in Mar. of 2002, Grandpa had passed away in Feb. 2002, Grandma passed away in Aug. 2010. I am sure that there were some reunions and the best reunion they had was with their loving Father. It's hard being here when I so want to be in Heaven with Jesus and my family. I also know that my work on earth may not be done yet and that is why I am still here. I am sure that Grandpa and Uncle Bill are watching me and seeing what a beautiful young woman I am and are very proud. I love you Grandpa and Uncle Bill.
Thanks for letting me share this with you. God Bless
That was something that I had to learn to do. Before we were married, Billy was laid off from his job. He got another job a couple months after we were married. He had never worked with children who were sexually abused and at first he wasn't too sure then I started telling him that I believed that he could do it and his countenance began to change all because I told him that I believed in him. He began to feel that he was a man and could do it. On the flip side, he still tells me that I look pretty when I get done up to go out with him. I like being told that so the more we go out with people the more likely I am to take the time and make myself look good. But my sole validation comes from my Heavenly Father who is romancing me and wanting me as his bride.
Billy sometimes gets me flowers and God sends his flowers to me in a variety of ways. There are signs all around that God has done this for me and me alone. How lucky I am to have a Heavenly Father who is willing to go to so much trouble just for me.
When Billy is upset or concerned about something, I always ask him if he wants to talk about it. Sometimes he does and sometimes he says that nothing is wrong. I let it go because when he is ready he will tell me. He does the same to me, he will ask me what's wrong if I have a concerned look on my face. That is the simplest most loving phrase that Billy could ever ask me. I have shown that I need him to be my hero and he comes ready to protect. By the same token, Billy has left me know that he needs me to be his help mate (ezer kenegdo). I said yes to God and sacrificed my job to take on a job of taking care of the things at home. It has not been easy but I enjoy being at home and having the dogs love on me. Aside from the unconditional love of my Heavenly Father, I have unconditional love from the dogs. I can spank them for wrong doing and five seconds later, they are on my lap and licking my face and telling me that they love me no matter what and will be faithful to me to the end.
See, this is why I like being at home. I have my time with God and I also have time to spend with Billy and his parents and the dogs. I have learned more about myself in two years then when I was living on my own and worrying about being married. I love my life and what God has given me.
Dec. 2 marks the two week anniversary that Uncle Bill has left this life and went home to be with the Lord. He and my Grandpa were identical twins. They served in WW2. Grandpa fixed the planes and Uncle Bill flew them. Uncle Bill was also a POW. Aunt Gwyn passed away in Mar. of 2002, Grandpa had passed away in Feb. 2002, Grandma passed away in Aug. 2010. I am sure that there were some reunions and the best reunion they had was with their loving Father. It's hard being here when I so want to be in Heaven with Jesus and my family. I also know that my work on earth may not be done yet and that is why I am still here. I am sure that Grandpa and Uncle Bill are watching me and seeing what a beautiful young woman I am and are very proud. I love you Grandpa and Uncle Bill.
Thanks for letting me share this with you. God Bless
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